Ramblings - random thoughts on life/love -

I just felt like typing these: i don't know where this would lead, and therefore i call them ramblings. They don't necessary mean anything, just some thoughts i have...

As a child, i wasn't like those people who wanted to grow up fast, turn 16 so they can drink and smoke, (no wait, actually i did want to turn 16 so i can go into the arcades legally. hah~), and maybe go into pubs.

I wasn't interested in any of those.

I think from young, i just wanted to stay young.

I don't know how stress it would be when i grow up, or when does one person actually grow up? Is it defined by your age? Like when you're 21?

Or is it defined by eventful moments in your life? Somehow when i typed the last line, the only thing i recall is my 2 friends who committed suicide. Damn. What did they die for? They died for someone who didn't deserve them, that's what.

I learnt that life, isn't at all like what they show in the movies. The nice guy will always finish last, the bad guys will usually live to a ripe old age, and heroes die first. The good people will end up dying first too. Life is unfair, at a point in our life one will realise that.

Now that's life.

Love however, is absolutely nothing like the movies or books you read about. The feelings that one experiences varies, but most people will have experienced heartbreak, jealousy & envy, and also hopefully the feeling of completeness, and warmth and joy.

Yet when one experiences heartbreak and jealousy more than anything else, does Love become uglier for them? Or sweeter? Its always two sided isn't it? What you experience can make you stronger, or it can also break you.

Its all those experiences in our life that defines us, what we are now. And what i am now ... isn't someone i would envy.

I still seek to find that 'perfect' someone, even though i've been hurt time and again.. (damn, i knew i shouldn't have broken those chain messages.. haha.~) I may have already met her, and lost her... (but i sure hope not), yet a part of me is still dreaming.

At least i can dream ... if i ever lose my dreams in love and hope... i think there's really nothing for me to live on anymore.

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Somehow, everyone expects me to be married in the next few years... i mean, are you people taking it for granted? I'm seeing being a bacholar for the next few years a definate possibility here.. i must say i'm thankful i'm not a girl...

Otherwise there will be people saying 'when are you getting married ar?'

Sheesh. I think somehow those people are either out of topics, or they're damn insensitive. What has other people getting married got to do with you anyways? Esp relatives... omg. I haven't even got asked this question yet and i'm already scolding them... what's wrong with me? Lol~~

Anyways, marriage is about 2 people... okay, and maybe their parents and siblings... okay, add their friends in too, no wait, add their extended family... then again, add in everyone else.

Marriage is primarily about 2 people, but rare is the case that you'll won't be cut off from the outside world... you will have arguements and problems, and sometimes the only way you can solve them is through outside help... or friends for that matter.

okay.. i think that's enough random thinking for tonight. See you again people~