isn't it strange

Isn't it strange how sometimes we look at ourselves in the mirror, and start thinking 'Hey, i'm pretty good looking', only to look at yourself in the same mirror a few hours later thinking 'eh, what happened to me? i need to lose weight'.

Kinda makes you wonder whether its the lighting, the mood or morale at that time, or is it something else.

Please comment guys~

Memorial blog entry for Fadly

Memorial blog entry for Fadly

For you who's soul departed on the 24th May 3 years back, you who probably has loads of malay girls chasing after, you who will be known as the friendly guy who plays the guitar(or was it only me?), you with the good natured smile and nice laugh.

I would remember you, for the last time we met, which was the school performance we put up with, back in Hongkah.

I couldn't believe i did that performance, it was so funny and outrageous, i still wonder what posessed me to do it. But yea, it was fun, and we had a few very fun practice sessions together.

I couldn't believe you left this world so soon Fadly, even though we never really met again after that.

There were so many more girls out there, why crush yourself for the sake of a flower who flew away?

You will be much loved and missed by all...

Memorial blog entry for Lionel

Memorial blog entry for Lionel:

Hi Lionel, its been some 4 years now. I would like to say that i'm doing pretty well now, and that things are looking pretty normal.

4 years ago on the 23th, you did something no one would ever expect, something so horrible that it felt like a tragic scene from a drama serial.

You threw everything away, your parents, your friends, everything.

You had but only just graduated from poly, and had what everyone would say 'a bright future' (though only in Singapore would they want you to believe that).

I guess the reason it was a shock was because you were such a cheerful and jovial fellow. We always saw you smiling and laughing. You were the good natured type who everyone loves to befriend.

But all that is gone now.

I don't think Mana would remember this day. It just wasn't worth it.

25th June - A day of many firsts

25th June - A day of many firsts

Work was pretty uneventful, til the last 30 minutes perhaps.
I helped shifted the cabinets back to the legal room... nothing much.

Today i talked to Roy. Last i talked to him was 2 weeks ago...
He msged me last week in msn, but i didn't see it cause i didn't log on to msn, or it restarted. Either way..

He told me that Steph passed away last week. She was on her way to a sports camp, and apparantly she ate something that triggered her allergy, and she had an asthma attack. They couldn't rush her to the hospital in time... and she passed on.

Damn man, this is one of the most stupid kinds of death. Aargh, it comes so suddenly and aargh.

What can i say man? I knew Roy from a few years back. When we first started out he was living in a farm in Canada, but wasn't very close to his family. In fact, i must say he led quite a few years of lonely and unhappy life. Basically he didn't have a lot of friends until he went to Toronto Uni.

He started to have fun there, and then he joined cheerleading. That's where he met steph. I've speaken to steph once or twice.. i even bought a pikachu soft toy for her, wanting to ship it to Canada (but it ended up being extremely expensive, so i didn't). She seems like the energetic sort, fun loving, sporty, that type.

I must say she was definately a good influence for Roy, and shared in many of his joys and triumphs. She was there when he got chosen to work for microsoft, and got offered the job to work in Seattle. In fact, they were going to move in together.

But damn, now she's gone. I don't know her that much but i can imagine the grief Roy had while helping with her parents last week. Sigh.

Another 'down' thing is that i found out today that Quan and LingJie had broken up. I don't know the official reason, but i guess LingJie just.. got bored of it all, or decided they're better off as friends.

Ah well.

ON a happier note, Jaslyn talked to me today. Its been a few months since we actually talked, and we're going out on friday to watch Shrek 3~ (I know i've watched it before, but its really funny and i don't mind watching again.) Besides, the company should more than make up for it. She's the only girl i've met in the past few years that can make me smile and feel excited...

Or rather, she's a rather excitable girl, quite act cute, but it adds to her appeal. Don't think i like her that way, but you'll never know lar.

At the end of the day, around 5:30, my boss suddenly said "Oh yea! I forgot about it! Come on Aaron lets go!", and off we went to some big auditorium in the main building. I saw like 70+ people there, and realised that we actually have quite a lot of people working there after all. Normally i see less than 20, expecting at most 30.

Had a slice of cake(some people bday lar), showed my face a bit, then went to the pre-employment checkup at Trinity clinic. Reached there at 6:25, only to realise that they open at 7pm. Wah liew eh!

I'm too tired to say anything, other than i got some more diarrhoea medicine (3 times loose bowels today) for $15, then went to food court to have dinner with quan. I'm to avoid milky and oily foods!

Played pool for a bit, i think i won 3-2, then we took 198 back.

I'm too tired... to say anything more. Its 11:50pm liao. Off to sleep~

My sunday, and some thoughts

I slept at 6am today, why?

Was watching Mrbrown show and some other funny shows, laughed til peng alot of times. Ah right.

Got woken up at 8am, then 10:30+. Seems the cable tv guy was in the area and wanted to do the thing instead of later in the evening, which was cool by me.

Then 11:30 got waken up again by Mom, asking me to go to yi po's grand-daughter's full month.

We reached at around 12:15, and one of the only pretty or rather girls that got my attention was this girl who had a smile i've seen before. Turns out she's supposed to be in my year, back in Boon Lay Primary that is.

Haha, i've told mom before that i don't remember her, and i still don't, other than the fact that i've seen her at the same place... the thing about her is that when she smiles she reminds me of liang jing ru~ my idol!

I guess i see a part of my idol in her, she's a shu-nu type too.

But beh, nowadays i got no 'feeling' to do anything. In fact, i don't feel like doing anything much. Dunno is my diarrhoea or what.

And regarding my lub life, when i see pretty girls, the thought that comes to me is, 'so what? pretty so what?'. I don't get the feeling of well, "theres a chance if i try, but none if i dont'" anymore.

Maybe its the lull period again, but i do want to see her again. She has a nice smile.. and strikes me as a nice girl. Hey, i've even seen her family already, makes it easier in the long run right? Haha~

Working again tomorrow.. work work work.

I've been reading quite a bit from this website www.singaporedemocrat.org
Its a very interesting website commenting on the state of politics in SG, and how we're being so oppressed and others.

Man this website really opened my mind to alot of things, especially the way SG is run. Truly.

You should visit the site when you come to it too~

1st week of work

I must say it has been rather uneventful.

The first day of work just showed me being introduced around, trying in vain to remember some of the names that were thrown to me, then trying to familiarize myself with the surroundings.

I also signed the written agreement of my employment, and well, surfed around.

My boss wasn't around for the next 2 days, so i just wiki-ed, and sgforumed a bit.
Believe me, i wiki-ed so much i had a headache.

Thursday saw me taking a MC for past few days' loss of appetite and loose bowel movements. Bleh.

Basically i slept the entire day, only to wake up on friday feeling like 'shite', like i didn't sleep much at all.

Never felt this way before actually, its like the drugs induced me to sleep or something. Or something.

Anyways i grappled with the idea of taking another day's worth of MC, decided against it, and went to work.

I had lunch with some of the girls Jiahui used to have lunch with, just that i was very quiet, considering i was still feeling weak and groggy. Beh.

Didn't go out on friday, feeling too tired.

Woke up on Sat by the drilling and construction sounds, and i couldn't sleep anymore.
Plans for the night were cancelled, so i'm still free tonight, don't know where i can go even. Hmm~

Decisions Decisions

As my journey through life goes on, there are many times in which we are forced to act. Forced to choose an option over the other. From lighter thing like 'whether i should go for this bbq instead of that dinner', to 'i don't feel too good, should i see a doctor?'

ALl these events have no doubt surfaced in the past, but things seem more serious now, considering we do have to claim responsibility for each action that we take.

Sometimes the right option turns out wrong, and the wrong, right. Yet one must never forget, once you have chosen, no matter how attractive and nice the other might have been, forget it, you have already chosen. Its like 'The grass is greener on the other side'.

Don't regret. Regrets are for those who have too much time to think on the wrong things.

Beh. This is just a random thought.

Bleh.

Its times like this when i really dislike my dad.

Saturday afternoon he called, persistantly, the phone kept ringing! Just to ask if mom was at home(which she obviously wasn't, else she would have picked it up right?), but not before saying that i'm leading a good life, able to sleep so late.

Wtf? I have 1 week to slack after my ORD, only 1 week. I expect my work to be really busy and stuff, and here he goes saying stuff like this. And the only reason i wake up late is because i slept late. Is it any wonder?

This afternoon he called again. Just to ask me how to spell T-U-E-S-D-A-Y. And also to comment that i'm still sleeping?

Beh. He won't get any more chances to do that. In fact, he better not call me the next weekend. Its stuff like these that gives me headaches when i wake up. Sigh.

What i did 1 week after my ORD, before i started working

Its been a long time.

Yeap, i know its been ages since i last blogged, and i won't give any excuses.
True, i've been really busy, really tired, and quite confused/angry at one point of time, but now i'll just blog what i can.

During the last 3 weeks, i've been to geylang twice(i've never really walked there before, so its quite an eye-opener), went out with Cow, Fai, Shiyu, Edward, Michael, Noel(?), the guys from TMC, guys from BMT(both section 1 and 2), Jason, Alex, and so many more.

I've also eaten at seoul garden, bowled, played pool, went ktv, eaten at japanese restaurant, watched (Men in white, Shrek 3, Ocean's 13, Fantastic 4, is there anything else?), went for BBQ, lan gaming, gamed at home, went to the airport, bought formal clothes, and also ORDed.

Ah yes, on my ORD day, the 8th of June, i also went for an interview, the second interview was on the follow thursday, and that's the day i got the job. Though i was initially very very disappointed to hear that i'll be getting only 1.5k a month(1.2k bring back), i guess i've gotton over it.

Yeap, i've been to many places, done many things, and i guess my fun meter is almost filled up, and that's good, because i start work on Monday, the 18th. 10 days after i officially ORD.

I've been thinking alot after i ORD, some when i've heard my buddy from BMT intending to propose to his gf in a few months time, some when i hear some of my friends earning much more than 1.5k a month, some when i keep seeing my friends driving their cars around, and some, when i went to Keat's house for a BBQ, and i saw pictures of my friend in Japan, when he went on ORD day.

Talking about the disappointment and anger part, that was on the second interview, when i realised i was receiving just 1.5k a month. I have friends, who are getting at least 1.6k, and i seriously thought i'll be getting just as much. I even thought they would count NS as part of it, and give me at least a bit more than my female classmates then. But no, that wasn't the case.

It seems that in these 2 years, they don't count as work experience at all. I guess i finally understand why they consider NS a complete waste of time.

In this society, the guys are supposed to outshine the girls. Even though we preach equality now, the guys are still supposed to earn much more than the other sex, and are also expected to drive cars, own credit cards, and others. Since we start out 2 years later than them, how are we supposed to do that?

I guess we could always go for younger girls, but in Singapore, when the FT(Foreign Talent) can skip things like NS, reservice, Remedial Training, the Singaporean guys are really losing out man.

This is the first time i've seriously considered emigrating. To Hongkong. Hah~ But that's just a thought for now.

The pictures from Japan looked really nice, made me wish i can go visit, but at 1.2k take home pay, 100 for my poly course loaned from Dad's CPF(for the next 5 years at least), 70 for my insurance(for the next 20+ years), and the 1k loan i still owe, i'm really just taking home less than 1k a month, that's if i don't spend anything on entertainment, and bills.

Wow. And i do want to visit Fai in Hongkong/China by next year. Not to mention thoughts of taking a license, my root canal treatment...

Somehow life may have been much easier, had i stayed on in NS. So many things to spend on, yet so little money huh? I need new specs, a new phone...

Looks like going over may take some time yet.

Ah yet, one should always be optimistic! Come on world, i'm ready!

I'm bored and tired.

Bleh, loads of stuff happening lately, but just no energy/drive to blog.
Just.. so tired... zzz

I'll update soon!~